Aspirin has been making “der nayes” (the news) lately.
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DEAR PHARMACIST: ASPIRIN THERAPY HAS ITS RISKS
herald-review.com, 2/15/12
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SANTORUM DISTANCES HIMSELF FROM “ASPIRIN” COMMENT
Santa Maria Times, CA
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THE WAR ON WOMEN, PART I:
KEEP YOUR KNEES TOGETHER, GALS
2Politicajunkies.blogspot.com
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Just a few weeks ago, a new study suggests that daily aspirin is not for all. Nearly a third of middle-aged Americans regularly take a baby aspirin in hope of preventing a heart attack.

Yes, 20 million Americans take aspirin each day and some medical literature indicate that aspirin therapy may NOT work in about three out of ten people.

Speak to your “dokter”/cardiologist for his/her advice.

And more recently, Foster Friess, the main donor behind Santorum’s “super PAC,” said on MSNBC that “aspirin used to be an acceptable method for contraception.”

Friess said that “gals put it between their knees, and it wasn’t that costly.” (He followed the comment with “gelekhter” (laughter.)

Obviously, “Vos oif der lung, dos oif der tsung.” (What’s on his mind, is on his tongue.)

Santorum, who is a devout Catholic, has said that he opposes contraception. However, he’s calling Friess’ comment a “stupid joke.” He added that he is not responsible for everything his supporters say and that the comment by Friess was “in bad taste.”

Yes, Friess may be a great “bal-tsdoke” (philanthropist), but he’s lacking “saichel”-(common sense.) He’s made many women “broygez” (angry) with his stupid comment!

Friess did apologize for suggesting Bayer Aspirin as a contraceptive method. The Wyoming [cowboy] billionaire said, “My aspirin joke bombed as many didn’t recognize it as a joke but thought it was MY prescription for today’s birth control practices….”

Perhaps he should read Nora Ephron’s book, “I Feel Bad About My Neck.” She writes, “Just before I moved to New York, two historic events had occurred. The birth control pill had been invented and the first Julia Child cookbook was published. As a result, everyone was having sex, and when the sex was over, you cooked something.” Now THAT’S FUNNY!!!

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Marjorie Wolfe’s advice for Foster Friess: “Vos vainiker me ret, iz als gezunter.” (The less you talk, the better off you are.)